Lawsuit-free since 9/14/05

Saturday, November 13, 2004

How Peter Snedeker touched my Jungian man-gina

In a recent letter to the Shill News, Peter "Fortune 500" Snedeker recently wrote what was, presumably, supposed to be a scathing attack on our very own TBOC!. And I have to say, we're touched. Pete (do you mind if we call you Pete?) writes that "The attacks stem from a hateful grudge that these individuals bear against a wide variety of students, faculty, and staff for reasons that could only be conjured up in their weak and timid souls." Pete may think we all have separate distinct entities--"souls"--but I kind of like the notion that the contributors to TBOC! are part of a broader Jungian "collective unconscious" or "world soul." However, the collective unconscious, at least as C. Jung wrote of it, is neither weak nor timid, but something of incredible power that encompasses all of us--even folks like Pete, or first lady and blond bombshell Carla Hunter. Do our actions stem from a "hateful grudge" (or "ju-on" as Japanese lore calls it)? Only if you're a huge pussy. Pete?

Snedekins further asserts, "Perhaps worst of all, some of these students lay claim to retaking a campus that operates on a moral and social code far out of reach for their juvenile behavior." Again, Pete's got it half-right. "Juvenile behavoir" aside, the "moral and social code" that SLU operates on is indeed "far out of reach" of TBOC!'s contributors--especially when one considers the perverse, shallow values this Potemkin village's residential petty hypocrites hold to be a genuine "moral and social code," an act which in itself requires a degree of pathological self-delusion so grandiose that it warrants its own appendix in the DSM-IV.

But perhaps we are too rough. We contributors have a lot in common with Pete. At least, he seems to think so. Apparently, like him, we are "white, male, and privileged," but won't come clean about this because it might "undermine" our "crusade." Short of naming names, that's presuming to know quite a bit about us. Unfortunately it's an assertion we think Pete might have a difficult time proving. That's why we're inviting him to do just that. Pete, feel free to write us at takebackourcampus@yahoo.com and let us know who we are, and hence, like you, "white, male, and privileged." We'll post your whole response unedited. Scout's honor.

One thing Pete can say for sure though, is that we are "self-proclaimed activists"--an inaccuracy at best, as we have never proclaimed any such thing--that "hide in corners" of campus, and "lob loaded remarks from afar" rather than coming "to the table and work[ing] for change." While we're not sure that the internet (or "internets," as Pete's man calls it) qualifies as "afar," the question is not whether our remarks are loaded, but whether they are true, something he and his ilk have never addressed. Kind of one of those "neither confirm nor deny" sort of things, I guess.

But back to my man-gina (you know, like vagina, but belonging to a guy). What did Pete really say, amidst his repeated and rather dismal attempts at the occasional literary flourish, that really touched it? I think it had to be this, my favorite part: "And finally, continue to hope against all odds, as I do, that this select group of disenfrenchised students will overcome the hatred and cowardice that rests so deeply within their hearts." It really gets you, like when conservative parents send their gay children away to "conversion therapy camps" while continuing "to hope against all odds" that "they will overcome the hatred (of heterosexuality and Levitical teachings) and cowardice (of the opposite sex) that rests so deeply within their hearts." The point, of course, is that TBOC! has about as little to do with hatred and cowardice as Thelmo has to do with accountability and the democratic process.

Our condolences must, nonetheless, go out to Pete. After all, life's tough when you're one of America's true select fortunate sons. And we know that when people say bad things about you, it can really hurt your feelings. Well, no, actually, we don't. And maybe that's because we are just that juvenile. Or, maybe it's because the true juvenile in all of this simply never learned the old preschool adage, "Sticks and stones can break my bones, but names will never hurt me." Moral of the story? Unless we show up at your door with bats, why worry about lil' ol' us, Pete? You just keep on truckin'. Or, if you're into that kind of thing, snortin'. As for the rest of us, we'll just chalk your letter up to one more cry for help.


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